Your satire is far too real! 🥹. I raised 3 daughters in the 80s and was a stay at home, JD Vance style mom until they were out of elementary school. I love them all, but sometimes wanted to beat them when they didn’t act like obedient ducks in a row as they should. I contemplated suicide because I thought they would be better without me. I spent five years in counseling that wasn’t covered by insurance. I had a lawyer for a husband, so we could afford it and he wanted to stay married. He had his own set of expectations to fill. No, this isn’t satire, it was my life.
My daughters are grown. Two are married and one is not. Counseling is their friend when they need it. My oldest is a married cat lady with no kids by choice. She owns her own business. The second is married and has 2 children-living the dream of two in diapers. Her career as a high school teacher is now occasionally substituting. Oh, and she is in a mixed race marriage. The youngest is single. She has no cat. She works for her oldest sister, she visits her 90+ year old grandmas every week. She advocates for Palestinians, homeless….
The parenting struggle is real.
This country is incredibly weak. It doesn’t know how to focus on what is important—its children, families, and communities. It has lost its focus on the value of human beings. 😢😭. It has forgotten how to love.
Sadly, I agree. Which is why I left the country in my 20s, was supposed to be a permanent move, but I couldn't handle the misogyny in Latin America. Patriarchy has its claws everywhere. Maybe it's different down there now? Your daughters sound amazing, btw!
And God forbid that you get a divorce after decades of marriage and raising said children and have to depend on your ex for spousal support which he resents paying and isn't enough to support yourself because you were dumb enough to give up your career out of love to stay home with and raise your children. But the good news is that I'm now a childless dog-lady... and I'd be a cat-lady too if my dog wouldn't eat the cat.
So glad to see you and a good number of others pushing back against the virulent stupidity of telling women what their choices should be, over and over and over again!
Coming from a dedicated cat woman who was told her whole adult life that she couldn’t have kids then miraculously- one day- did! With a man who already had 4 kids!
“Turns out it DOES take a village — of voices in my head — to keep me from burning it all to the ground.” So great, Summer! I have to wonder what powerful social change, what impactful pushback, can happen for women in this political moment. Maybe it will start with electing Kamala?
For sure, electing more women and especially indigenous women. Indigenous ways center community and collective. I think we need to bring back the village and get rid of the idea that we all need to do everything ourselves and start helping each other again. 💕
Thank you, Cindy! Laughing and crying and screaming... pretty much all we can do! It's nice that I no longer feel like I'm screaming into a void :-) <3
Thank you once again for a spot on and lol reality check. MC and I wrote a long letter to the ADN editor not long after Trump was elected. Point of pride was being called boner killers in the comments.
Your satire is far too real! 🥹. I raised 3 daughters in the 80s and was a stay at home, JD Vance style mom until they were out of elementary school. I love them all, but sometimes wanted to beat them when they didn’t act like obedient ducks in a row as they should. I contemplated suicide because I thought they would be better without me. I spent five years in counseling that wasn’t covered by insurance. I had a lawyer for a husband, so we could afford it and he wanted to stay married. He had his own set of expectations to fill. No, this isn’t satire, it was my life.
My daughters are grown. Two are married and one is not. Counseling is their friend when they need it. My oldest is a married cat lady with no kids by choice. She owns her own business. The second is married and has 2 children-living the dream of two in diapers. Her career as a high school teacher is now occasionally substituting. Oh, and she is in a mixed race marriage. The youngest is single. She has no cat. She works for her oldest sister, she visits her 90+ year old grandmas every week. She advocates for Palestinians, homeless….
The parenting struggle is real.
This country is incredibly weak. It doesn’t know how to focus on what is important—its children, families, and communities. It has lost its focus on the value of human beings. 😢😭. It has forgotten how to love.
Sadly, I agree. Which is why I left the country in my 20s, was supposed to be a permanent move, but I couldn't handle the misogyny in Latin America. Patriarchy has its claws everywhere. Maybe it's different down there now? Your daughters sound amazing, btw!
And God forbid that you get a divorce after decades of marriage and raising said children and have to depend on your ex for spousal support which he resents paying and isn't enough to support yourself because you were dumb enough to give up your career out of love to stay home with and raise your children. But the good news is that I'm now a childless dog-lady... and I'd be a cat-lady too if my dog wouldn't eat the cat.
Haha!
And yes.. sigh.. I'm learning more about the term "motherhood wage gap" aka "motherhood penalty," which is where I am financially as well. <3
What wages? 😉
Right!
So glad to see you and a good number of others pushing back against the virulent stupidity of telling women what their choices should be, over and over and over again!
Thank you for seeing, Frank!
Coming from a dedicated cat woman who was told her whole adult life that she couldn’t have kids then miraculously- one day- did! With a man who already had 4 kids!
Go 🖕🏽JD.
Serious boner killer.
Loving the picture of your mom (and you) 🩷
Oh dayum! I mean... wow, that's a lot!!! I didn't realize you merged with four other children! And I love cats! I wish I wasn't allergic, sigh....
“Turns out it DOES take a village — of voices in my head — to keep me from burning it all to the ground.” So great, Summer! I have to wonder what powerful social change, what impactful pushback, can happen for women in this political moment. Maybe it will start with electing Kamala?
For sure, electing more women and especially indigenous women. Indigenous ways center community and collective. I think we need to bring back the village and get rid of the idea that we all need to do everything ourselves and start helping each other again. 💕
Bravo!! I laughed, I cried...I cried some more...
Thank you, Cindy! Laughing and crying and screaming... pretty much all we can do! It's nice that I no longer feel like I'm screaming into a void :-) <3
Thank you once again for a spot on and lol reality check. MC and I wrote a long letter to the ADN editor not long after Trump was elected. Point of pride was being called boner killers in the comments.
Haha whaaa? they called you that??!?!
Yep. We’ll see if I can dig up a screenshot.
Absolute gutting perfection.
THANK YOU! (sorry for shouting)
It is nice how, with Substack, at least now we're not so much screaming into a void...